Tasks Out of Relationships not Responsibility

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Tasks out of relationship not responsibility.

Okay so this sentence may seem extremely simplistic so let’s break it down. Of course the day to day life, we have tasks that we simply must do, things that have to get done and honestly things that don’t always give us joy in the moment or are any fun. I understand, but a simple perspective change on tasks can leave you not only finding JOY in those things but understanding you’re building a relationship.

When I first came across this quote that I deemed was just for me nestled in a book- it made me think of the word discipline. Every day I’m working from home I have tasks, some I think ARE actually fun, and others repeat every single day and probably don’t even have to be listed anymore, but I want them there, to remind me they’re just as important.

Every day I list walk, read, workout, (along all the other tasks for work, house work, errands, sessions, podcast- whatever it may be.) but those 3 remain. At first like any habit, they seem like just a mundane task that could easily be overlooked, I could easily say I don’t have time, or it’s not important, or I need to get to my client’s emails quicker or have my editing done an hour faster than I could if I would just do the things I named, but those things spark discipline in my life and more than that, they spark relationship.

Those three things spark relationship with myself. Ya know, the thing most people especially women tend to throw aside first, deeming all other people and tasks more important than themself, more like a marterer. If they put other people first, they’re not selfish, they’re worthy but honestly I see it as… ya’ll are TIRED, uninspired, and not showing your families your best selves when you don’t spark relationships with you and God.

My walk may look like just a walk, but it gets in steps, it helps motivate my exercise later, it reminds me of good eating habits because I’m working on all the things, it’s time with my dog, and MOST importantly, it’s a few moments of quiet. I use to to pray/be thankful/think through the day/ and even sometimes get my business ideas flowing. It’s a relationship I’m building with myself, dog, and God.

Reading may seem like an extracurricular you just don’t have (psst. Stop watching so much tv or scrolling, just for like 15 minutes a day.) it’s my other quiet time. It’s me, it’s reflecting on relationships, it’s praying for others, it’s reading and working on relationship with God, myself, working on my heart, healing, and sparking ideas for business. Also if you HATE reading or just can’t focus, try audibles or podcasts (like the one you’re listening to now!) Over the past month I have pretty much stopped listening to music (for a season) as this is my growth season. It’s filled with car rides of radio talk shows, podcasts, encouragement, and like I said.. reading in me quiet moments in the morning and protecting and preparing my heart.

Working out may just seem like another task too- and one SO many can talk yourselves out of. I have hated cardio for years, but I switched to listening to business podcasts while I run, and it helps relieve stress more than music could. But it keeps my body healthy, moving, and helps my brain too.

I always say you should work on your heart and brain just as much as you work on your body- so the tasks above are equally as important, for growth, healing, and strengthening.

Alright, so where’s the switch from responsibility that’s simply a task I should do to relationships. Those things I listed make me a better woman as I heal, it makes me a better girlfriend, it makes me better at serving, softening my heart, it makes me better with my business, and it makes me a better woman serving God too.

The tasks (and many others) aren’t just a HAVE to check off the list cause I have to do it and blah. It’s a- I get to do these because it’s building my relationship whether it be with myself, friends, family, God, dog, and clients. I’m doing it for a better relationship with me. And when you shift from doing it because it’s relationship growing rather than just check marks on the day, it brings me joy, it allows me to not rush through them, it makes me WANT to, and I make time for them.

Do the tasks make me seem more responsible, sure. But with a clear mind and better relationships, I can focus on work- I find I can carve out the to-dos for work much quicker, which I can’t even begin to explain, but we all say working on relationships is important, can we agree to that? We work hard getting money, working on careers, spending time building businesses, and what are we doing daily to work just as hard on the relationship with our selves? The ones spent praying for our significant others and reflecting and being thankful in it, the relationships we have around us are the most important- so why not do the tasks out of relationships and not responsibility.

I promise I still have time to sit and scroll, watch tv, and quite frankly be a bum sometimes around the house. But that’s not what this life is for. It’s for relationships and loving, so let’s start doing more of that- behind the scenes, and working on your heart.

After all, one reason I wanted to build a business was to MAKE time during the day during the sunshine hours to do the things that bring me joy and build relationships and sneak in some beach time too when I can not to mention put relationships first.

I’ve had unhealthy boundaries with work where I would feel anxious for not responding immediately, putting my relationships to the way side because I’m building a business or not ever letting go of not looking at my email for a couple days, filling up my calendar and not saying no, and making excuses that I HAD to get something done rather than workout, read, walk, or do the things that I set out to intentionally do while building a business.

I get it, we’re all busy, but setting intentional time for relationship tasks- isn’t that worth setting the time for? Time to sit down and right down a few habits we can take on, and not just ADD to the list of to dos, but a few things that can be let go of.

Here’s what I do. I write down 5 things I MUST accomplish that day (yes some days have more tasks- but after a lot of research and experience in this, I find it’s a GREAT place to start.)

It might look like work, workout, read, walk, podcast. Or pick up kids, work, dishes, walk, dinner with family, to start out- start with tasks that are relationship building, so that they’re not all just to do’s but tasks that BUILD. I know there will be days where the lists are longer, but if we MAKE time for the relationship tasks it’ll bring more joy to our days, the days that seem to go quickly after looking back and realizing you didn’t read one book in a year, or spend time with kids outside as often as you’d like. YOU have the ability to create your life- yes there will always be life tasks we have to do- so set up your schedule for the relationship tasks too.

It won’t be perfect, and days will still pass that you didn’t get in what you’d like for building, but it’s not about perfection it’s about progress. Progress towards a life that is more intentional, relationship building, self care building, and loving more days that just watching them pass by.

When I jump on the phone each evening to chat with my fabulous boyfriend, I get to (most of the time) feel good about work, and my self life. And even thought we live a part, I get to have worked on our relationship through self -discovery, prayer for us, or something I’m excited for our future.

Build tasks in relationships rather than just responsibility and watch joy come into your life. Even in the small things, you’ll start to realize exactly what you have when you’re intentional are golden moments when you’re building relationships.