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3 things we have to start owning.

Women. we have a few bad habits. i’ve found the more I photograph and am around women we tend to do a few things that get in the way of our dazzling confidence. We have to start owning it….

3 habits to start owning as women

1-Your Body. When I meet with women for a boudoir session, I often ask what they love about themselves. Want to know the answer I get most often? A resounding list of things they hate about themselves. I’m not saying I won’t be sensitive to things they’re insecure about, but every woman has SOMETHING she loves. And we tend to answer a positive question, negatively. Can we all agree to work on that? It promotes negative thinking, saying the things we love just builds us up! it’s a very small stepping stone in working on that daily self-love. Point out the good to yourself. We were given this one body, so feed it healthy food, get some exercise in when you can, point out the good and sometimes eat some donuts to still enjoy life. (or wine. whatever!) Start by pointing out what you love!

2- Your passions and work. When someone asks (and i’m guilty of this one too) what we do, we tend to shy away rather than shout out either our job, side gig, or even hobbies. DANG IT. I am a photographer, graphic designer, blogger, and lifter. But if we don’t do it full time or only have a few clients or are just starting out, we deem ourselves unworthy of a title. All you who run, when do you call yourselves runners? how many miles, hours, experience, races? doesn’t matter? you run. therefore, you are a runner. Photographers, you have had only a few clients and are inexperienced? We all start somewhere, you are still a photographer. I can openly say I don’t make gobs of money (or like none) from blogging. But i’m a blogger. The things that make us money might seem a little scary to own the title to, that’s why there are literally classes on your 30-60 second business opener, but we’ve got to be proud of our passions, and if you can say it with confidence it’ll sound a whole lot more appealing to those around you. Because WHO KNOWS who will be interested in joining you, your business, or even hiring you. You were given those talents, passions, and desires with purpose, so be proud.

3 things we need to start owning about our lives

3- Your life. There are some things in every one’s life that maybe we are unsure about. Maybe we HAVE to be patient until we can move forward, but overall, and especially in the last few years i’ve learned that you control your life. Like for real, you can change it. You are SO capable. It’s both the best and worst thing about it. No one to blame or lean on for results but the wonderful person we see in the mirror. (Oh and look how beautiful you are, inside and out shining when you’re doing the things you’re passionate about) We’ve got to start owning the life we’ve made for ourselves. I’m not saying it’s easy, oh no not even close to easy. Whether you stay at home with kids, work away from home, just got married, just got divorced, are working on getting healthy, or a better job. Nothing about chasing after your dreams and goals are easy, especially when we constantly compare to the lives around us. So that’s why you have to read a little, and journal what happiness means to YOU, what has been placed uniquely in your heart as your purpose and work on it diligently. What things are your priorities and how can you move towards a happier life. It’s all baby steps, and you have the full control to do so. Only you.


These are just 3 things to start owning, but if we can shift HOW we talk about our bodies it can change our thoughts and confidence. If we can shift how we talk about our passions, it could change our mindset on our importance and skillset, and if we can change aspects of our life, then we can move towards our purpose. That’s pretty powerful. Do you think 9 years ago when I moved from Minnesota that I would be where I am now? Not. Even. Close. But honestly, it’s bigger, better, and a whole lot more scary than I thought. I never thought i’d be okay being uncomfortable away from family and many times alone but i’ve grown more than I even knew was possible in such a short time. I uncovered parts of myself I didn’t know were even there. I promise i’ll continue to work on owning it too, it’s a practice.

We have to start owning it.

Keep Shining

Shanna Star